Life's a Soup

In this hour of despondency, my heart goes out to the brave martyrs of academics. To call ourselves the scape-goats of a beat-all evaluation system would be a disgrace. I would rather liken us to the martyrs of a struggle. We fight, so we are!

Be it the eternal slumber that engulfs the class rooms, be it the eternal rains that screws our plans for sports, be it the profs with vendettas, be it the unconditional, un-imagined quizzes we encounter, be it the despicable delicacies of the ‘food place’ or be the un-fair names of fraxers we are labelled with, all we do is Struggle !
Struggle according to our beloved Mr.Wiki is
“A strenuous effort or the act of making a strenuous or laboured effort.”
True to every word, this is the story of me and you and all of us here.
Douglous McGregor was actually right when he coined the famous Theory X, although he never preferred it himself. For the sane people not addicted to theories and management jargons, Theory X is nothing but an assumption that there is a natural tendency in people to shy away from their responsibilities; they are always looking for ways to not work.
How Insightful!
I am actually quoting excerpts from my management lessons is not something I endorse as natural. It’s a direct consequence of my academic overdose I had on the behest of preparing for mid-terms. In 24 hours flat I came face to face with theories framed and reframed for 300 years! Not my fault... I was inducted into the learning system just one month back. So it doesn’t seem to have given me a big advantage had I started off with regular studies. Still I would have to comprehend centuries of theories and explanations given by some of the most indiscreet men in World History.
Every debacle, troubling moment or tragedy comes with a silver lining..... You feel relieved that it’s finally over! This feeling is unbelievable! You actually have to go through the cattle excretion ( for the innocent minds!) to come to enjoy the mild titillations of this very feeling of completion.
And what on earth does this feeling make it so worthwhile? Applying management theories of least loss & most profit, I confess that this feeling is perfectly compliant. How? Imagine 65 people getting tortured by a common academic enemy. Applying knowledge of basic mathematics, the pain faced by each victim is 1/65. Don’t blame me for not curbing my academic inclinations as I am trying my hardest to let go this forced liking. But week after week, the burgeoning schedule of mid-terms and quizzes keeps getting me back to Square One!
Alice In Wonderland is one that comes to my mind when I put my position in perspective. She had to run faster to stay in the same place – A notion I never comprehended earlier, but now I am living that feeling. To snap at any point would be detrimental to my survival in this heaven!
Oh Holy Golly! I just remembered, had to get back to my chosen set of tortures.....
In the meantime, ‘Pray’ for us and watch this space!

Fires Spreading...

Its bewildering to realise how time stagnates for months with absolutely nothing much to talk about and next instant the world around me wears a changed face, a face of an excited child at the prospect of discovering the kaleidoscope of colours in the reflections of Sun. Its not the best of feelings to go through when such a thing happens in your life. The control no longer rests with you and you alone. It seems like I am drifting through emotions like a fish through water. One moment I feel like I am the lonely traveller sifting through faceless crowds on a busy highway. The next moment I am in the midst of a fairy-tale with the best of people and best of moments waiting to unfold. It is a feeling of excitement laced with curiosity for I seek to understand the events unfurling before me.

The more I think about it, the more complicated the feeling becomes for me to express. I am going through a commotion of sorts. The clarity that often is evident in my thoughts and actions has gone on a long unannounced vacation. Destination: Unknown. I am left with interpretation of moments that I am living by, some correct and some not-so-correct. It doesn’t matter if I am getting them wrong because I wonder if there is anyone out here who actually can make out the right from the wrong. I think the best thing for me to do right now is to sit back and watch the wonderful imagery coming up on the canvas called life!

Parting ways from reality is something I have always resisted. It doesn’t change anything; just creates a phony of sorts to create illusions that make you feel complete, that make you feel special. Little do we realise that below all these layers of cosmetics, there lies a me or a you as similar to each other as can be!

For now, the only verifiable truth I can comprehend and endorse is that Things are on a roll!!! Just watch this space for lots of excitement!!!

Name changes, Identity remains the same!!

Hi Everyone...
This is to inform all and sundry that the name of my blog has been changed from 'tusharzinn.blogspot.com' to 'slowfires.blogspot.com'

Intent of activity: Unknown
Target Audience: The world's my audience
Impact: Definite!!

New World Order

Newsflash...... I am back!!!

Its been awefully long since I reflected but yes the good news is that I am back for good!

Its a new place, new feeling, new learnings, new friends, new life and yet the same ol' story..... The story of Change.

This story seems to have engulfed evry nook and corner of my mindscape spreading newer colors on the canvas and washing out all that was old and gone. New bridges are being built on the old rivers as the old torn rags of life seem to be shedding their wares on the way to discovery!

At this juncture, I look at myself at the mirror and I see a traveller with a lantern in my hand and a light of curiosity in my eyes as I stand poised to unravel the mysteries on the road to my defined destination.

"For all your days in life,

face them all alike.

When you 're the anvil bear,

when you are the hammer....STRIKE!!"

I am back ....... I am so definitely back into reckoning...... Back to a New World Order!!!!

A Fresh Look at Life....

When the eyes are dreary and drained,
and the days are spinning like circles around the same centres,
All it takes to change the ambience is
A fresh look at what we find around us....
Carpe Diem!!!

So refreshingly easy to think so, it feels like the easiest thing one could ever do. Taking a deep breath of fresh air from the neighbourhood park , kicking the stone on the road, I feel like I have just given life another chance to resurface in front of me, this time only to be more invigorating, exciting and inviting!!! But life is such a bad learner that there are hardly any changes worth expecting. What seems like a distinct possibility of life turning a corner and bouncing back, all it does is change the mirrors we look in, paint up a superficial canvas depicting happiness and hopes to cheer us up. But little does it realise that we humans are hungry souls. And suspicious ones to add to the agony! We seldom accept good feelings and great times without a care for scrutinizing the motives and speculating the 'behind the curtain' reasons.... Seldom do we chose to accept the reality that , given the sadness, disappointments, tribulations, maladies and melancholies, life does sometimes spring up spurts of fresh happiness like the dew on clean petals of jasmine after a night of chill . Oh the ubiquitous human nature afterall!!!

But can't we change? Can't we atleast try to change? Can't we just close our eyes for once and get lost in the sweet music of life and forget our pain & anger and get ourselves intoxicated in the sweet bliss of nature? Can't we just hold life's fingers and let it lead us into tomorrow without a care of suspicion or reason? Can't we become like the toddlers who enjoy the feeling of being tossed into the air without a care of what happens at the other end of the joy-ride, if no one catches them in their arms? Come on.... Let's try for once to be what we were!! Let's go back to the yesterday and try to be the same forever.... Oh what bliss!!

And when I am all done with the tasks of the day, its so relaxing to sit back in an empty office with the lights dimmed. It makes me feel like I have just hogged centrestage with spotlight on me. As though the world sits in silence anticipating a masterpiece from me. Its as thought the silence around me depicts the audience waiting in waited breath for an act so austere ,so original that which can create an aura of brilliance, an ambience of creativity and a world of happiness all around!!! Its time to start my act..... Watch this space!!!

Amongst the ruins.....

This post is dedicated to all my friends at M&M - Marketing. The reason I dedicate it here and now is because we are at Mumbai, just done with an excruciating review session which lacks in purpose and vision. Nevermind, we are here at Hotel Hilltop, off Worli seaface.... all guys are drunk except one!!! You can guess by now who that one is.....
This is a piece of my artistic best , written on the back of the hotel manual , etching the memories of my stay with one of the best guys I 've met...... Will miss u guys....

Amongst the ruins

It is but a night, afterall
that things just happen around me.
Is it a dream, is it a curse,
or is it my destiny???

Its surreal to find people
faltering all over me.
Are they drunk, are they boozed,
or is it a truth shown nakedly?

'Cause I know the truth is just,
that things will be normal tomorow.
It's just a drop of happiness,
Tomorrow we 'll be back with sorrow!!!

The Pipeline's getting bigger!!!!

This always happens to all of us, I guess!

We keep expecting things to happen. It feels like something is waiting just round the corner. We feel we are almost there but not yet. That there is a wee bit of distance to travel before we reach our destination. And by the time we realise, the pipeline would have got really long.

We are always told to have patience and wait for the right moment crack the nut. But little do we realise that by the time we wait for the best moment, lots of not-that-great moments pass away. And in retrospect when we realise what we missed, it leaves a pang of guilt that we didn't give it a shot!!!

I am at a stage in life when the pipeline's getting a touch to long. There's so much of anticipation in the air-work, home, love and the dream of a career of my choice!!!

But as anyone would advise, the mantra is to keep it steady and keep pushing. Some day I am gonna get my world. As I coined a phrase for a friend "Rest as they never say is, Mystery!!!"

Watch this space!!!!

Missing you Bangalore......

Hi ....
Its been a long long time...... Time has created such a distance between my passions and my life that it gets harder and harder by the day to keep in touch with my interests and hobbies.
I am right now in Bhubaneswar- Land of Temples. How ironic is life? A while ago I used always snub at any thing that had to do with religious customs and practices. It made me wonder what could really be the whole reason behind this. And look today, destiny has had its way and sent me to a land so famous for its temples and pious ambiance. I sit today remembering my older days. Today marks the end of 9 months of distancing myself from my family, friends and my love. And to add to the agony, the rift created between me and the place I love - Bangalore.
I will continue later.....